"Letting Go"

Sooner or later, everyone you know will disappoint you in some way.
They'll say something or fail to say something that will hurt you. And they'll do something or fail to do something that will anger you. It's inevitable.
Unfortunately, you make things worse when you stew over someone's words and deeds. When you dwell on a rude remark or an insensitive action made by another person,you're headed for deeper problems.In fact, the more you dwell on these things, the more bitter you'll get.

You'll find your joy, peace and happiness slipping away.And you'll find your productivity slowing down as you findmore and more time thinking about the slight or telling others about it. Eventually, if you don't stop doing it, you'll even get sick.

So what should you do the next time someone betrays you?TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FEELINGS.Even though the other person may be at fault, even though the other person wronged you, you are still responsible for your own feelings.In other words, other people do not "cause" your feelings. You choose them.

For example, two different people could be told that their suggestions made at the staff meeting were stupid and idiotic." One person may "choose" to feel so hurt that henever speaks up at any other meeting again. The other person may "choose" to feel sorry for the critic, sorry that the critic couldn't see the wisdom and necessity of hersuggestions.As long as you blame other people for your feelings, as long as you believe other people caused your feelings, you're stuck. You're a helpless victim.But if you recognize the fact that you choose your feelings and you are responsible for your feelings, there's hope. You can take some time to think about your feelings. And you can decide what is the best thing to say or do. Then, you've got to learn to WALK AWAY FROM DISAPPOINTMENT.

It's difficult to do, but it's possible. (by Sooner or later, everyone you know will disappoint you in some way.
They'll say something or fail to say something that will hurt you. And they'll do something or fail to do something that will anger you. It's inevitable.
Unfortunately, you make things worse when you stew over someone's words and deeds. When you dwell on a rude remark or an insensitive action made by another person,you're headed for deeper problems.In fact, the more you dwell on these things, the more bitter you'll get.

You'll find your joy, peace and happiness slipping away.And you'll find your productivity slowing down as you findmore and more time thinking about the slight or telling others about it. Eventually, if you don't stop doing it, you'll even get sick.

So what should you do the next time someone betrays you?TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FEELINGS.Even though the other person may be at fault, even though the other person wronged you, you are still responsible for your own feelings.In other words, other people do not "cause" your feelings. You choose them.

For example, two different people could be told that their suggestions made at the staff meeting were stupid and idiotic." One person may "choose" to feel so hurt that henever speaks up at any other meeting again. The other person may "choose" to feel sorry for the critic, sorry that the critic couldn't see the wisdom and necessity of hersuggestions.As long as you blame other people for your feelings, as long as you believe other people caused your feelings, you're stuck. You're a helpless victim.But if you recognize the fact that you choose your feelings and you are responsible for your feelings, there's hope. You can take some time to think about your feelings. And you can decide what is the best thing to say or do. Then, you've got to learn to WALK AWAY FROM DISAPPOINTMENT.

It's difficult to do, but it's possible.

(by Dr. Alan Zimmerman)